Confuzzled Thoughts

I feel really confused tonight. Just general confusion. I'm even confused about what I'm confused about. If you figure that last sentence out, you're just as confused as I am! ;-D

Life is confusing I guess.

Su isn't coming up this summer. I guess I didn't really expect it - I was hoping, but not expecting, which is what I tend to do with things of this nature until they become definite (i.e. the tickets have been purchased, etc.). So it was a disappointment, but not as big as it could have been.

Maybe I'll use the money to buy a PSP. Or maybe I'll do something totally more responsible and save it for school.

Probably the latter.

My sister is officially 16. Makes me feel old.

I have a Spanish test tomorrow that I definitely have NOT studied for. But the strange thing is, I don't really care right now. Aside from my final, it's the last test of the semester.

Okay, I'm gonna stop rambling now.

Love Song and Last Words

Hmm...Interesting...I've never heard this song before, but now I want to.

Your Love Song Is

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing by Jack Johnson "Maybe you've been through this before But it's my first time so please ignore The next few lines cause they're directed at you I can't always be waiting, waiting on you I can't always be playing, playing your fool" You've been waiting for love, and you're not going to wait any longer!

What Love Song Are You?

HAHA! SO ME!!

Your Famous Last Words Will Be:

"I dunno, press the button and find out."

What Will Your Famous Last Words Be?

More Answers to More Questions!

What calendar theme do you have? I have a scrapbook calendar that I got for Christmas. Yeah, it's definitely NOT decorated.

Favorite Bible verse? I have several...Romans 8:28 and Romans 12:2 and basically the entire book of Ephesians

Have you got a picture of yourself in your room? Yeah, a pic of me and Susen, and a collage thing of my life that my Mom made for me

Do you prefer night or day driving? Both. As long as I've got good music to listen to and I can roll the windows down, I'm happy. If I'm driving in the rain, I like to have a book on tape. :-D



Some interesting things that happened to me today: I had a bug crawl across my foot this morning, I drove the fastest I have ever driven in my entire life, I got educated on the subjects of tattoos and body piercings and underwear, and I braided my short hair for the first time.

Guys Are Weird

I have officially decided that guys are weird. I actually decided this a long time ago, but am just reaffirming my belief.

There's this one guy at work who only speaks about 5 words of English, and he's constantly just...hovering. That's the only way I can think of to describe it. Whenever I turn around, he's there. And he's always calling me pet names (in Spanish) and basically just making a nuisance of himself. And he does this with all the girls, not just me. I guess he's nice, but he just doesn't know when to leave us alone!

And this other guy at work, the new dishwasher dude named Tyrone asked me for my number. That was pretty much the only time I'd ever talked to him except when we were introduced. Here was the extent of our conversation...

Him: *mumbles something about there being a lot of dishes*
Me: Yeah, it was busy tonight
*A few seconds of silence*
Him: Do you live around here?
Me: Yeah, I live about ten minutes away *pointing* that way.
Him: Oh. Do you have a boyfriend.
Me: (By this point I knew what was coming.) *sigh* No.
Him: Do you mind if I get your number?
Me: Well...I'd have to get to know you better first.
Him: Yeah, that's what I mean.
Me: No, BEFORE I give you my number.
Him: Oh. That's cool.

Yeah, that's pretty much ALL we ever said to each other. Except he might have asked me if I'm in school, I'm a little foggy on the details.

So I guess it's common practice for guys to ask girls they've just met for their numbers? It doesn't really make sense to me, though. I mean, honestly, I know nothing about him! He could be a serial rapist or murderer or both! Why would I give my number to someone I hardly know? *shrugs* I dunno, it's never made sense to me.

But then, not many things do.

Forget Mr. Right, I Want a Mr. Darcy

I just finished watching "Pride and Prejudice." It was awesome - I knew it would be. I need to read the book again. I need to BUY the book. I think that's what I'll do. Next time I'm at the bookstore, I'm gonna buy it.

Anyway, to answer the "Darkest secret" questions so far:

Most embarrassing moment? I honestly can't think of any. I'm constantly running into things, so that hardly fazes (sp?) me anymore. I get the most easily embarrassed when I say something really stupid or out of place - but even then I can't think of one particular time.

Favoritest song ever? Just one? How 'bout a list - This I Promise You, Canon in D, Moonlight Sonata, among others.

Movie you need the Kleenex for? Titanic and The Return of the King. Umm...I think that's it...

Any bad habits? (nail biting, knuckle cracking, etc) I don't bite my nails, but if they break, I peel them off. Also I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek, and Gramma says that I could get cancer from that. Those are the only ones I can think of.

I like answering these questions - ask me more :-D lol

Dark Secrets

So, since Chris divulged one of his deepest, darkest secrets (and i laughed at him) he told me I should post my dark secrets.

The only problem is, I can't think of any.

So how about this - you guys ask me questions and I will answer them. Ask me as many questions about anything you want. So that way, you'll find out stuff you want to know, and then people can see that Samantha really doesn't have any dark secrets.

I Love My Friends!

I just wanted to tell you guys thank for leaving me comments! I love you all! *big huge hug* It's such a comfort to know that you are here for me, even when I'm being stupid. :-D

So Clearly Confused

So life is simple. It is on the surface anyway. I mean, anyone who looked at me would probably go, "Wow, she's got it together!" As a matter of fact, I've heard that (or variations of it) said to me more than once. And yeah, I guess everything's going okay.

So why do I still feel lonely? Why am I still crying myself to sleep? Why can't I just let things go? Why can't I figure out what I want to DO with my life?

I try so hard to do what I'm supposed to do - get a good job, go to school, save my money, be a good friend. Not that I do it out of duty, but because it's what I WANT to do. It's who I am. But sometimes, when I get a free moment to be bored of the repetitiveness, I think - really think - about it all. And it's like, okay, I should definitely have a clear goal. I should know what I want to do with myself. I've got all this going for me, what am I going to do with it?

I'll tell you what I want to do - fall in love, get married, and have a family. But they don't give degrees in the study of falling in love, getting married, and having a family, so I have to think of something else to spend my time and money on.

Then I get to thinking - what if I never meet the right guy? What if I never do fall in love? Where does that leave me? I can't imagine it. I honestly cannot imagine myself simply following a career. I mean, I could if I had to, but that's definitely NOT my first choice. I've never even been on a date - how many 19-yr-olds have never been on a date? Not that it's necessarily a bad thing, but you know...I just get lonely sometimes.

I just want Mr. Right to show up. I guess. I dunno, I guess that's my problem. But I don't want to settle for anything less. I don't want to settle for Mr. Almost-Right just because Mr. Right isn't showing up fast enough. But I DO want this loneliness to go away.

God is good and wonderful and gracious, but His timing is not our timing, and sometimes I get impatient. It's something I have to work on.

I guess to sum it up - today I feel like the one and lonely.